Ladies and Gentlemen, I’m Staph Infexxion of the band Cat Torcher, and I’d like to welcome you to Legend of the Hare.
Before we begin, I’ll need to make a few quick comic safety announcements.
Fire exits are located to the left and right of your room, as well as the alt text of page 7. Should the majestic awesomeness of this comic cause your monitor to explode into flames, that’d be a really weird thing to happen. Like…wow. I would be very surprised.
Smoking is the audience is strictly prohibited. If you want drugs, please ask an usher for a syringe instead.
Please turn off all cell phones, video games, pagers, vibrators, electric razors, shock collars, self-guided tiddlywinks, and other electronic devices until the comic has reached a safe cruising altitude. Once we are airborne, a comic attendant will collect your pagers and deliver them to starving children in the 90s.
Finally, please be advised that suing us for damages – while morally justifiable – is strictly prohibited. So please don’t.
Now, please sit back, adjust the resolution on your monitor, and enjoy the comic.